Movies & Mirrors: Sid in “Brown Sugar”

Sid shifts uncomfortably in the church pew, as she watches the love of her life marry another woman. Her smile, forced, meets his shameful gaze as he passes her.

For those of you that know me, you know that Brown Sugar is one of my absolute/all time/favorite black love stories. Not only does this film remind me of my 12-year-old self, but it signifies something bigger – it was Brown Sugar, and “I Used to Love H.E.R” by Common, that inspired my writing. I didn’t understand the power of a metaphor until I saw this film. I picked up the pen, wrote my first poem, and attempted to connect to something deeper, after witnessing the weight of words in this movie.

Working at a mainstream record label, Dre Ellis (played by Taye Diggs) is introduced as Sidney’s best friend since childhood. The two of them developed a friendship founded on their mutual love and respect for hip-hop. As fate may have it, the two of them pursued careers that fueled that love, with Sidney writing and serving as an editor for a major hip-hop magazine. The quote, “When did you fall in love with hip-hop?”, is found throughout the film, as it feeds the narrative. 

As the two of them have matured, their relationships – with each other, and with hip-hop – have become more complicated. The struggle to remain true to themselves, and their love for the art form draws them near. In the end, it is evident that we’ve witnessed two love stories. Both have progressed beautifully, but not without struggle or sacrifice.

So what’s the difference between rap and hip hop? It’s simple. It’s like sayin’ you love somebody and bein’ in love with somebody. Rap is only a word.

As a young lad, I wanted to be a writer. A journalist, actually. Over time, I grew fearful of a life defined by fleeting creativity and decided to play it safe. When I watch Brown Sugar, I live vicariously through Sidney, and her contributions to XXL magazine. She found what she loved at a young age, and she planned to spend the rest of her life writing about it. That’s remarkable.

Sanaa’s performance as Sidney contributes to my love for her character. Her grace, and ability to portray an emotion that looks different for every person resonates with me and it’s stuck with me for a decade. Watching this throughout my teens and early twenties, I wanted love that could exist across state lines. I wanted love that persisted after rejection. I wanted love that was anchored in an endless sea. I wanted love to feel infinite. I believe that my desire to love myself, and another, grew with this film.

The complexities of Sidney’s character makes her one of my favorites. Outside of having an established career, doing something that she loves and being damn good at it, she is draped in humility. She is guided by her intuition, and goes with love, every time. I see parts of an ideal self in Sidney Shaw. Her gifts, modesty and willingness to go the mile for those that she loves left me captivated by a dynamic character with depth.

During a toast at a party, Dre raises his glass to Sidney. The room stiffens, when he
states, “You are the perfect verse over a tight beat.”  I’m with Dre.